Sunday was the first day I held another newborn baby since I held you in my arms and told you how much I loved you and will see you again. I was so scared, as soon as I saw the baby in the room I started to cry. I just wanted YOU so bad! Even now the thought and aching of wanting and needing you brings me to tears.
You are a sneaky one I must say. When I asked you Sunday morning to give me the strength to see this baby, I wasn't expecting the sign I got!! How in the world does a little boy end up wearing the same outfit, that we put you in on the last day we would see you on this earth? Amazing. Thank you for the sign.
I remember picking that outfit for you thinking how cute it was, then going to buy a pink onesie to go with it. You looked soooo cute and cuddly, I don't know how they got me to walk out of that room without you.
You know I think about you everyday and I really am trying to be a good person so I can make you proud. I will see you again, I will hold you in my arms, rock you to sleep, kiss your face, kiss your belly & toes. I don't think I will ever put you down when I do see you again.
I ask every night to see you in my dreams, but you are busy playing right now. Make sure to come and see me Peanut Butter. I miss you so much and don't know how to express myself to you except having the heaviest heart and biggest lump in my throat.
All my Love, hugs & kisses