Isabelle Hope

My name is Sarah, and my husband James and I lost our beautiful baby girl on feb. 28, 2008.

When I first found out I was pregnant I was scared to death. I was 19, living with my parents, and going to college full-time. After going to the doctor and seeing my baby on the ultrasound though, I was changed forever. My baby was perfect and I loved her so much.

At our first ultrasound appointment we were told that there was no fluid around the baby and that it looked like the baby was dieing. The ultrasound tech also told us the baby was not measuring correctly. My heart was broken thinking that my baby was dieing in there. We were immediately sent to get a level 2 u/s. The u/s techs at the level 2 u/s told us that our baby was measuring fine and that the fluid was on the lower side of normal but everything was ok. We got pictures of the baby and left feeling like everything was going to be okay.

The rest of the pregnancy seemed to be going fine. The doctor said I was measuring good and everything seemed fine. One day I got in an accident and immediately went to the doctor who said everything was fine and he wouldnt give us an ultrasound. I had to get a rogham shot because I was rh- and the baby was rh+. Trusting the doctor I still thought everything was fine. In late January however I began to swell and showed my doctor that I was swelling but he said it was fine. We had told the doctor that my mother had pre-eclampsia and we thought I was developing it but he assured me that even though my bp was up and I had gained a lot of weight fast, that because I didnt have protein in my urine I was fine. Once again we believed him and thought everything was fine.

At 36 weeks we thought we would get another ultrasound but the doctor said I wouldnt get another ultrasound unless he felt there was something wrong with the baby. We fought with him to get an ultrasound explaining that our other preggo friends got one at 36 weeks and shouldnt he make sure she was ok especially since before we were told she had low fluid. He told us no.

On Feb. 26th I went in for my normal OB appt. and my bp was elevated. The doctor had me lay on my left side which made my bp go down some. He sent me home and told me he wanted to see me again on the 27th to check my bp again and possibly admit me.

I woke up on the 27th and had a weird feeling. When I ate breakfast I noticed that the baby was not moving like she usually did but I figured it was normal since it was the end of the pregnancy. I met my mom at her work and talked with a few of her colleagues about the baby. I still had a weird feeling but thought it was just nerves about possibly being admitted. My mom drove me to the doctors office where they checked my bp. My bp was still high so they made me lay on my side and took it again. It was still high. They decided to get the baby's hb on the doppler but seemed to be having a hard time finding it. The nurse thought it was just the doppler so she got another one and she still had trouble finding it. She went and got the doctor who came in and tried to find it and said he had found it. He hooked me up for a nst and they noticed I was having contractions. He told me he wanted to get a reading for 15 mins and then decide if he wanted to admit me. He ended up leaving me for 30 mins and came back and said that he didnt like what he was seeing so he was going to admit me and do a 24 hour urine and that he would be over at L&D in 2 hours to see how I was progressing and possibly induce.

We were so excited. We called everyone and told them that we may be having a baby today. We got the registration papers and walked to l&d. We got our room and I got into my gown and I was so excited. A nurse came in to hook me up to the monitors but was having trouble with getting the baby's heartbeat. We told her the doctor had the same problem and we showed her where he found it. She placed the monitor on the spot we showed her and then she left the room and came back with a nurse and 2 u/s checks. She said she didnt want to scare me but did we just walk over here after hearing the heartbeat. We told her yes. The 2 u/s techs, which happened to be the same ones we went to the first time we had a scare, started to look for a heartbeat. They couldnt find one so they tried using color and still couldnt find one. They called my Ob and he came over and looked at the u/s machine and then proceeded to tell me he was sorry but there was no heartbeat. My mom freaked and kept asking him how when we just heard it. He explained that what we could have heard was my hb echoes. I was devastated. My husband had to call everyone and tell them our baby was dead. It was awful and all the doctor proceeded to say was some grief is expected but dont let it get out of control. We wanted to kill him. We just lost our baby and all you can say is some grief is expected?

I was put on magnesium that night to bring my bp down and given a cervadil to help progress. The next morning I was given pitocin but was still not progressing very well. My Ob came in and broke my water and when he did there was hardly any fluid.

At 9:34pm after 15 min. of pushing, Isabelle hope Burford came into this world. She was 6lbs. 1oz 19in. long. She had a head full of red hair just like me and she had my big feet.

The first thing out of the doctors mouth while Isabelle was still making her way out was that my baby had mold which proves she had been gone for awhile. We went off on him and told him that it was not mold and that she had not been dead very long because we knew for a fact that she was moving that Tuesday. We sent the placenta off but the results were normal. We will never know what caused our baby Izzy to die because we opted not to have an autopsy.

After losing Izzy we decided we wanted to switch doctors and find one who was more compassionate and who knew more about what he was doing. One of the main reasons we decided to switch was because our OB said that if I get pregnant again he wouldnt do anything different with the next pregnancy. We retrieved our records from the doctor and found that I had been having some warning signs throughout the pregnancy. In January at the same time as my bp went up and my weight, the baby's hr had dropped and I had protein and a trace of blood in my urine. I was never told of this. They would not check the urine until we left usually or right before, and when we asked about how it was they said it was fine and had no protein. The next time I get pregnant I am going to make sure the doctor shows me my records and I am not going to take everything for granted.